As the sun rose on the third morning, a proud, shrill laugh echoed out of the gates of Silver-Fork Port.
Eunuch Cao rode out of the city inside his thirty-two-horse gilded palanquin, wearing a suit of ceremonial gold-plated court armor over his silk robes. His right pinky finger was still bandaged from where the angry Glow-Worm Ink had bitten him yesterday, and he had sneaked out of the VIP Guesthouse before breakfast to avoid paying Abacus Su’s one-million-tael room bill.
“Pei Xuan!” Eunuch Cao stood on the front balcony of his giant palanquin as his thirty-two white horses trotted into the open gravel square between the city wall and the Royal Army’s camp. He pointed a golden command flag at Pei Xuan, who was standing calmly atop the Eastern Gate Tower with General Tie Zhan, Abacus Su, and Hong Ling. “The three-day deadline has expired! You haven’t handed over a single tael of the thirty million taels of Royal Rainwater Tax, nor a single sack of purple spirit-rice!”
“Why would I hand over thirty million taels to a guest who just skipped out on his hotel bill?” Pei Xuan called back pleasantly through a brass megaphone. “Commissioner Cao, according to our VIP Guesthouse ledger, you still owe us one million, one hundred and forty-two thousand silver taels for two nights’ lodging, thirty-two bowls of boiled scallion water, peppermint air service, and forty-eight piles of royal horse manure!”
