At high noon on the eighteenth day of the twelfth winter month. The frozen earth outside the northern stone wall of Frost-Pine Town shook like a drumhead under the pounding paws of five hundred giant mountain war-wolves!
BOOM-THUD! BOOM-THUD! BOOM-THUD!
Billowing clouds of yellow road-dust and kicked-up snow rose sixty feet into the crisp winter sky. The dreaded Blood-Wolf Mercenary Corps halted in a jagged, half-mile-wide crescent formation just one hundred yards outside the closed iron-bound timber gates of Frost-Pine Town.
Every single one of the five hundred mountain war-wolves stood as tall as a northern draft ox, their coarse gray fur bristling like iron wire, their jaws dripping with thick, bloody foam. Their eyes glowing a terrifying, bloodshot crimson from the forbidden [Berserk Blood-Boil Pills] that Lin Fan had shoved down their throats at the river crossing!
Atop the backs of those five hundred snarling beasts sat five hundred scarred, leather-and-chainmail-clad mercenary cutthroats brandishing heavy steel battle-axes, spiked iron maces, and serrated broadsabers.
At the very center of the vanguard rode forty-two-year-old Commander One-Ear Scar [Rank 2 Peak Martial. Half-Step Grandmaster], a two-hundred-and-fifty-pound mountain of muscle draped in a black bearskin cloak. Resting a ninety-pound double-bladed steel battle-axe across his shoulder while the smooth, shiny scar where his left ear used to be gleamed in the noon sun.
And riding on a borrowed donkey twenty yards behind One-Ear Scar’s iron stirrups—with a thick woolen scarf wrapped around his bruised jaw. Two charcoal lines drawn crudely on his forehead to replace the eyebrows Grandpa Yao had blown off—was eighteen-year-old Lin Fan [Rank 1 Early | Luck Halo: 22%]!
Even among the rough, unwashed mountain mercenaries riding beside him, Lin Fan looked like a complete circus clown:. The winter sweat on his forehead had smudged the left charcoal eyebrow-line half an inch higher than the right, his face was locked in a permanent, lopsided expression of maniacal shock. Every time his borrowed donkey trotted over a stone, the three missing molars on the left side of his jaw made his teeth whistle in the cold wind!
Yet inside Lin Fan’s chest, a venomous, all-consuming fire of spite was burning hotter than ever.
Laugh at my charcoal eyebrows all you want, you ignorant mountain brutes! Lin Fan thought savagely as he glared up at the stone battlements of Frost-Pine Town. Clutching the wooden pommel of his donkey saddle with his bandaged right hand.
*Once these five hundred Berserk War-Wolves smash through the north gate and trample West-End Orphanage Street into red mud, Gu Changsheng’s precious town reputation will be ruined forever!
While he scrambles to save those thirty worthless orphans, I’ll take back my green plush turtle, break Gu Nian’s and Su Nuannuan’s legs with an iron crowbar. Empty every single copper coin and fifty-year ginseng root out of Peace Pharmacy!*
Beside Commander One-Ear Scar in the front row, thirty-eight-year-old Mercenary Vice-Captain Bull , at Rank 2 Mid,—a burly, square-jawed man with a brass ring through his nose—frowned slightly. He felt the giant mountain war-wolf beneath his saddle trembling and coughing up flecks of hot, bloody foam onto the snow.
“Boss Scar,” Vice-Captain Bull muttered uneasily, patting the burning neck of his six-hundred-pound mount, Old Gray. Which he had raised from a pup in the northern ridges seven winters ago, “these red pills that eyebrowless kid gave our wolves at the river don’t smell right! Old Gray’s heart is beating like a runaway forge-hammer, and his nose is bleeding!
If we make them run another mile at full gallop, half our wolves are going to burst their hearts and die!”
“Shut your mouth, Bull!” Commander One-Ear Scar barked, though a spark of greed and impatience crossed his own scarred face as he looked at his foaming mount. “Once we sack that Peace Pharmacy inside the gate, they have forty-two boxes of spirit herbs and a Rank 2 female alchemist who can cure a thousand wolves!
The faster we smash this gate and grab the silver, the faster we feed the wolves cooling herbs!”
Looking up at the thirty-foot stone battlements of Frost-Pine Town—where Captain Gu Tie, eighty mansion guards, Poison-Hand Wu’s eighty-one pink-aproned herb gardeners. A trembling Town Magistrate Liu stood looking down—Lin Fan stood up in his donkey stirrups, pointed his bandaged right hand at the wall, and screamed at the top of his lungs:.
“Gu Changsheng! You shameless thief! Get out here and kneel before Commander One-Ear Scar right now!
Hand over the two-foot-tall green plush turtle, return my forty-two boxes of spirit herbs and ten thousand silver taels. Bring out your two little brats so I can break their legs—or Commander One-Ear Scar’s five hundred Berserk War-Wolves will smash your town gate into toothpicks. Trample every orphan and widow on West-End Street into meat paste!”
Beside him, Commander One-Ear Scar spat a mouthful of sour phlegm onto the snow and raised his ninety-pound steel battle-axe toward the battlements with a booming. Gravelly roar that rattled the roof tiles of the gatehouse:.
“Listen up, you sheep inside Frost-Pine Town! You have ten breaths to open the gate and pile every silver ingot and pill bottle from your Peace Pharmacy onto our carts! When the Blood-Wolf Mercenary Corps counts to ten, we leave no chickens, no dogs, and no intact roofs behind!
ONE! TWO! THREE—”
Up on the stone watchtower, Town Magistrate Liu clutched the cold parapet bricks with both hands, his teeth chattering so hard he nearly bit his tongue:.
“Captain Gu Tie! Why did Patriarch Gu tell you to unlock the main gate from the inside?! If we open that gate against five hundred Berserk War-Wolves, they’ll flood down Frost-Pine Street in three breaths!”
“Magistrate Liu, keep your eyes open and watch our Patriarch’s back,” thirty-five-year-old Captain Gu Tie replied, his calloused hands steady on the parapet even as his heart pounded with excitement. “In our Gu Clan, when the Patriarch brings out his folding bamboo chair and his wolfberry thermos, the battle is already over before it starts!”
CREEEEEAK—CLANG!
Right on Commander One-Ear Scar’s count of “FOUR,” the heavy iron-bound timber gates of Frost-Pine Town swung wide open from the inside!
Expecting to see a desperate phalanx of three hundred armored spearmen charging out to meet them—or a terrified delegation of town. Elders crawling out on their knees carrying chests of silver—all five hundred Blood-Wolf Mercenaries raised their steel battle-axes and tightened their reins!
Instead, out through the wide-open stone archway of the north gate strolled just three people!
Walking casually in the center was twenty-eight-year-old Gu Changsheng, wearing a warm lambskin coat over a spotless white kitchen apron. Carrying a folding bamboo lounge chair tucked under his left arm alongside a large clay thermos from hot wolfberry tea in his right hand.
Walking three paces to his left was eight-year-old Gu Nian—barely four feet tall. Wearing a fluffy yellow cotton bunny apron over his winter tunic and a pair of yellow bunny slippers on his feet, holding a four-foot wooden broom in both small hands!
And walking three paces to his right was six-year-old Su Nuannuan—even smaller at three-and-a-half feet tall, wearing a pink rabbit-fur winter dress with two little pom-pom hair-buns. Holding a shiny [Rank 2 Little Fairy Pink Watering Can] in her right hand. The chubby green [Jade-Turtle Plush Doll] peeked out of her small school backpack with tiny gold spectacles perched on its nose!
Up on the stone battlements directly above the gate archway, sixty-two-year-old Grandpa Fu calmly leaned his [Jade-Abacus Cane] against the crenellations. Opened a thick new ledger book titled [Northern Highway Road-Maintenance & Bandit Labor Accounts]. Dipped his brush pen into a warmed inkstone while Rank 2 Mid Poison-Hand Wu and his eighty-one pink-aproned herb gardeners leaned over the wall waving encouragingly at the two children below:.
“Go get ’em, Little Fairy Boss! Go get ’em, Little Master Nian! Don’t let those mangy mountain dogs step on the flagstones we swept this morning!”
“Show those unwashed mountain bumpkins how our Gu Clan’s junior class cleans up litter!”
Down on the highway fifty yards in front of the five hundred snarling, red-eyed Berserk War-Wolves, Gu Changsheng unfolded his bamboo lounge chair with a crisp clack. Set it down in the middle of the swept stone highway, sat back comfortably with his legs crossed. Poured himself a steaming cup of red wolfberry tea from the thermos!
For five full seconds, dead, comprehension-defying silence hung over the entire northern battlefield!
Five hundred hardened mountain cutthroats blinked their eyes, looked at the man sitting in the bamboo lounge chair sipping wolfberry tea, looked at the eight-year-old boy with the broom. Looked at the six-year-old girl with the pink watering can.
Then Commander One-Ear Scar threw back his scarred head and laughed so hard that tears squirted out of his eyes and he nearly dropped his ninety-pound steel battle-axe out of his saddle!
“BWAHAHAHAHA! Brothers! Look at what the great Patriarch of the Frost-Pine Gu Clan brought out to block five hundred Berserk War-Wolves!”
One-Ear Scar howled.
Slapping his mailed thigh as all five hundred mercenaries behind him erupted into roaring, mocking laughter. “A bamboo grandma-chair, a jug of red-date tea, an eight-year-old kid in a yellow bunny apron holding a house broom, and a six-year-old baby girl holding a pink flower-watering pot! Did Frost-Pine Town run out of grown men, or did you bring your two kindergarteners out here to sweep wolf poop for my army?!”
In the rear of the mercenary formation, eighteen-year-old Lin Fan’s bloodshot eyes bulged with vengeful ecstasy as he pointed at Gu Nian and Su Nuannuan:.
“Commander Scar! Don’t let those two little brats fool you—that six-year-old girl is the Ten-Thousand-Poison Body I told you about, and that plush turtle in her backpack is my Golden Core treasure! Charge right now and trample them before they can move!”
“Hahaha! Since they walked out of the gate on their own two little legs, they saved my wolves the trouble of chewing through the wood!” Commander One-Ear Scar sneered.
Levelling his ninety-pound battle-axe at Gu Changsheng’s nose and kicking his ox-sized war-wolf in the ribs.
“Vanguard of one hundred and fifty wolves—CHARGE! Tear the man in the chair to pieces and grab the two brats alive!”
AWOOOOO—RUMBLE!
One hundred and fifty red-eyed, foam-mouthed Berserk War-Wolves kicked off the frozen earth at once. Hurtling toward the two small children at fifty miles an hour like an avalanche of iron teeth and steel blades!
Sitting calmly in his bamboo lounge chair twenty yards behind his son and daughter, Gu Changsheng blew gently on his cup of wolfberry tea and raised two fingers:.
“Nian’er, Nuannuan, remember Family Rule Number Three: keep the town entrance clean, confiscate all sharp metal toys at the door. Don’t hurt the doggies underneath—they were only fed bad medicine by a bad man. Go ahead!”
Inside six-year-old Su Nuannuan’s small pink backpack, three-hundred-and-eighty-year-old Grandpa Yao pushed up his tiny gold-rimmed spectacles with one fuzzy green flipper and nodded approvingly at the two children:.
“Listen to your father, Nian’er, Nuannuan! Those five hundred mountain war-wolves were force-fed low-grade Blood-Boil Pills refined with impure sulfur—their eyes look fierce, but their leg tendons are stiff from the poison heat! Nian’er, aim your broom wind half a foot above the snow to knock their front paws out from under them so they land on their thick winter fur without breaking a rib!
And Nuannuan, wait until your big brother stacks the front row into a windbreak. Then sniff one pinch of Grandpa Yao’s Tickle-Pepper and give those five hundred iron-clankers a big sneeze right down the middle!”
“Got it, Grandpa Yao! Watch my broom!” eight-year-old Gu Nian answered in a crisp, clear voice.
Tightening the yellow bunny apron bow behind his back with one quick tug before stepping half a pace in front of his little sister.
“And Nuannuan’s nose is already getting tickly!” six-year-old Su Nuannuan chirped bravely. Holding her shiny pink watering can steady in her left hand as the thunderous wall of one hundred and fifty red-eyed war-wolves closed the last thirty yards across the snow!
[ DING! GRADE-SCHOOL GATE DEFENSE INITIATED! ]
* Active Defenders: Gu Nian (Age 8, Rank 2 Early) & Su Nuannuan.
(Age 6, Rank 1 Mid) + Grandpa Yao (Coaching!)
* Enemy Vanguard : 150 Berserk War-Wolves + 500 Armed Riders!
* Daily Income : +52,000 DP/day -> +55,000 DP/day!